Wednesday, November 16, 2011

The cute school pictures I refuse to buy

I'm a sucker for school pictures. The blue background. The gap-toothed smiles. The cowlicks and stray hairs Mom's not there to smooth out. I'm not the type to spring for the super package with the 8X10 print and keychain, but I'm good for a sheet of wallets (not that anyone keeps photographs in their wallets anymore; that's what smart phones are for).

So imagine my surprise when we received Ada's proofs from Shutterbug Studios, the company serving her Montessori school. All the poses were in front of a snowy forest scene. With evergreens. At first glance, my reaction was "Wow, these are really Christmassy." Not that the gentiles have a monopoly on snowy forests, but she is leaning up against a pile of wrapped gifts in the shot on the upper right.

And my second thought: "Gee, she looks awfully underdressed for a stroll in the wintery woods." I mean the girl's wearing a dress and leggings (which I fully did not anticipate making it into the portrait session). Where are her coat, hat and boots? Wouldn't her hands be cold as she lies facedown on the "snow?"

As darling as Ada looks, these pictures are dumb. I won't be ordering any.

On the other hand, I'm tempted to get a print of this roller derby action shot by Oak Park sports photographer DT Kindler.