Then her mother catches him in the arms of another woman and flees Lagos to move in with her parents in their primitive rural home. Tiny Sunbirds, Far Away is the coming of age story of a girl uprooted, a family in turmoil and a country in chaos.
Seeing her father for who his really is--not the king of the family, but a flawed character -- a failure, really--is key to Blessing's initiation into womanhood.
And so relatable. I was 8 years old when my charmed childhood came to a screeching halt. Dad had an affair and my parents separated. I met the Other Woman. I hated her. I hated my Dad. Divorce was on the table.
Although my parents reconciled and the separation only lasted about half a year, my father's betrayal forever colored my opinion of him. I admired his charm, his professional successes and his smarts, but I couldn't shake the feeling that deep down he wasn't a good person.
My Dad died of a sudden heart attack 9 years ago this week. When loved ones die, Jews say "May his memory be a blessing," and my father's memory is a blessing.
A mixed blessing.
I received my copy of Tiny Sunbirds, Far Away as part of my membership in the From Left to Write Book Club. Instead of critical reviews, we write posts inspired by the book we've read.
4 comments:
sometimes even when your dad wasn't unfaithful, it is hard to accept him as a flawed person who may not have loved in the way he could have--thanks for sharing. i can definitely relate...
Thanks for sharing something that must have been so hurtful and scary. Accepting your parents as humans and flawed adults is hard enough. But, losing a parent before you have time to even try to work that out has to be really difficult.
Thank you for this post. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father. In many ways, I imagine that Blessing felt that she lost her father too, after she realised his flaws. It came as such a shock to her and undoubtedly changed how she felt about him, and their relationship. And as a little girl all she wanted to do was look up to her father. I suppose as part of her growing up, I imagined she would have to realise that he is flawed, as we all are. The realisation that adults too are stumbling through life making mistakes, is, I think, the biggest shock of childhood. Thank you so much for reading. Christie
Alma, unfortunately, I understand your pain. Thank you for sharing your story. If you'd like, please read the section of my memoir on my Dad.
http://www.brendabartellapeterson.com/index.php?page=notes&display=191n
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